Thursday, April 10, 2008

Muddling through the day...


Yesterday was one of those shitty days where almost nothing goes right. The weather sucks, you can't go to the park, you (accidentally) wake the toddler up because there isn't a binky in the bed (and his need to comfort nurse is outweighed by your need to eat). You howl in frustration and worry you are damaging your toddler for life.

You go to the store and buy too much stuff, but it was stuff you think you needed and toys. You don't think you're buying toys out of guilt (you had decided to buy a doll stroller weeks ago, in fact, and your child has NO cars and corvettes are cool!) but you don't really know, do you? At least you can say to yourself that you didn't buy everything he wanted, nor did you buy everything you wanted ($400 blow up spa, anybody?)

Then you go to choir practice and right at the end, after another amazing rehearsal of cuteness and joy, your toddler pulls down a hand-thrown, one of a kind, bowl that gets smashed into thirty kajillion pieces. And although the owner of the bowl doesn't get mad, she repeats several times that the bowl was "irreplaceable" and makes you feel like an ass for not keeping hawk-eyes on your child the entire time.

And then you get home, you wipe yourself off, and you watch Battlestar Galactica on DVD while your child finally sleeps. And then you put on your new (apparently sexy!) pajamas and go to bed. After some "cuddling" with your spouse, who also had a shitty day.

You just muddle through, as best you can. And then you wake up and you do it all over again.

2 comments:

Heidi said...

You know what? It get easier and easier for me to roll with this kind of day. I'm starting to let go and relax into the imperfect-perfect thing. Goddess bless this little blog for that. Seriously... having "wabi sabi, mama" as a whispered direction in my head is helping my mindset.

If nothing else, you have a place to vent! I hope our endeavor is helping you muddle through, and realize that sometimes muddling through is just as good as being perfectly awesome:)

(((Hugs)))

Lexie said...

Wabi sabi mantra = pure gold!!! I'm going to do that now, Heidi!

We're having to pay $100 for the pot Rems broke (apparently the replacement for her "irreplaceable" pot was $250 and she wants $100 from us). I almost lost my shit when I heard her phone message (as she'd said repeatedly to "not worry about it"), but :shrug M talked me down a bit.

We're not doing choir anymore after the next performance, tho.